• expect unexpected white bird on wood post looking to the right water in the background
    Aging,  Experiences,  Medical Related,  Random thoughts and processing

    Expect the Unexpected

    c/w – depression, illness, cancer I have learned through the years to expect the unexpected. I have many types of cancer running through my maternal and paternal family. It was always something I heard about and knew about, and I didn’t know the details as much as I knew that someone else had been diagnosed and died due to cancer. I had a cancer scare when I was about 42 and had some scary biopsies, but it ultimately turned out to be benign. I considered that a bullet missed and went on with life. I wasn’t overly appreciative of the good news; I just felt something else I had gone…

  • not like me white room and white bed with white woman on a bed laying on her stomach hands crossed brown hair red soled shoes in the
    Aging,  Experiences,  Self Love

    Not Like Me

    It is not like me to post pictures of myself online. Okay, so on this site it is kind of like me, but, the selfies on social media are not like me. For all the times I have looked at myself in pictures and rolled my eyes or headed to the frig for a cake icing and a spoon, you would think this picture would present a different result. Well, it didn’t. I didn’t run to the frig for the cake icing, but the eye roll was real. This picture, and more to follow, is a result of a very spontaneous “boudoir” photoshoot. My friends and I were sitting around…

  • white body with black strap bathing suit
    Aging,  BDSM,  Decisions,  Every Damn Day in June,  Kink of the Week,  kinks,  Self Love

    Feeling Strappy Kinks

    I am feeling strappy kinks!  Maybe I am feeling strappy because it has been forever since I have experienced them.  I love straps of any kind, in clothing, and how they feel when they graze my body.  My biggest kink (thus far) is impact play.  Spanking, crops, and belts have been my experience, and I love them all.  Flogging is something that I have not experienced but hope that someday I will.  Until then, I will settle for soft straps across my body.  This suit was ordered during one of my sleep shopping nights.  Silly, I know, but I honestly don’t remember ordering this!  It came in the mail, and…

  • saying hard things pink square like a package hole in the middle white face with pink lipstick
    Aging,  Decisions,  Distress,  Experiences,  Random thoughts and processing,  Relationship Thoughts Old and New,  Self Love,  Trust

    Love is Saying the Hard Things

    Love is saying the hard things.  Sometimes the hardest things to say are the things that need to be said.  Recently while sharing some whiskey with a friend, he made a comment so significant that it stopped me dead in my tracks. “The problem is T, love is saying the hard things, and you aren’t good at saying the hard things.” Well, fuck me!  The main problem with this was I instantly knew he was right, and that stung a little bit.  In my defense, I don’t like hurting people’s feelings.  I also do not like confrontation.  Put those two together and its a losing combination.  Who looses?  Everyone! I…

  • beautiful baby on blue and pink blanket
    Aging

    My Twenties

    My twenties were a mix of things.  Looking back, it should have been the best time of my life.  While my friends were still going to bars and trying to hook up, I had settled down.  Married at the age of 24, we owned a house and had started down the road to adulthood.  I had a good job, a nice house with an inground pool in the back yard, decent neighbors, and everything he had promised.  The only thing missing was happiness. I didn’t know it at the time, and even if I had some subconscious notion of not feeling happy, I would have and probably did suppress it.…