• white legs open with pink shirt at top of groin area on black blanket
    Distress,  Kink of the Week,  Masturbation Monday,  Memes and Things,  Self Love,  Sinful Sunday

    It Is Within Me

    It is within me.  Sleepless nights, brain on overdrive, everything tried, tossing and turning, where are the peace and calm? It is within me.  Hard to find at times, but I can reach it.  Fingers inserted into my pussy to explore and exhaust my physical self.  If I exhaust myself physically, perhaps my mind will rest. Some count sheep and some take sedatives.  I reach for my sole through the means I have learned what works best.  Time for myself.  Time to get lost. I am searching for peace and searching for release. I am tired of waiting for someone else to make it better.  No need for anyone else.  Would…

  • multi colored back ground with yellow letters spelling sorry
    Decisions,  Distress,  Learning the Hard Way,  Trust

    I’m sorry

    I’m sorry.  Some people often say that saying “I’m sorry” is difficult.  It doesn’t come easy to some folks.  I don’t understand that because I always say I’m sorry, even when I shouldn’t.  I would say it is almost compulsive.  I apologize to the wall when I bump into it.  I also apologize when other people hurt me.  Clearly, it was something I did that required me to apologize.  That has been my life.  For as long as I can remember I have always apologized first regardless if I was at fault or not. I don’t like making mistakes.  I like hurting people even less.  I have learned that I…

  • Distress,  kinks,  Lifestyle


    Something spoke to me about this prompt “Authentic”.  I’ve been struggling to find my words.  Struggling to find my thoughts and put them into words.  Actually, struggling to find my thoughts or make sense of them.  Authentic is something I have always strived to be.  I wanted to be authentic, honest and true to myself and everyone else, as best as I could.  I was raised that way.  My Mom was a shining example of authenticity.  I don’t say this sarcasm but with sincerity.  While she rarely said what was on her mind, whether she agreed or disagreed, she was always true to herself.  My Dad had a sharper edge.…

  • Decisions,  Distress,  Experiences,  kinks,  Lifestyle


    This is another tough one for me.  It goes back far into my childhood and I still struggle with friendships.  I have learned over the years, and most recently the hardest lesson, those friendships are precious.  Really good friendships are hard to come by. It is normal to have people come and go in your life.  It is sometimes working to keep in touch and it takes both parties to make that happen.  I had always felt I was the only one working on it most times.  Taking some time off from constantly reaching out to those that had drifted away, I found myself feeling pretty lonely.  It showed me…

  • Decisions,  Distress,  Experiences,  kinks


    The tantrum brewing in silence came as a surprise. She sat silent.  Staring at the phone.  His texts.  His words, his thoughts, his decision.  She sat on her couch, legs tucked under her, coffee on the end table going cold, television in the distance with another rerun of Law and Order SVU.  It was warm outside, but she felt nothing. Having arrived home from work, she changed her clothes to get comfortable and texted him to let him know his secondary had contacted her to ask if he was cheating on her with his primary.  She was neither his primary or secondary, she was just Toy.  Believing she was doing…