• White woman hazel eye color low makeup close up
    BDSM,  kinks

    Watch me

    Will you still watch me after I am gone?  Will you try to see what I am doing, how I am doing?  Will you track me through my blog or social media?  Will you wonder if I do things the same way? When you would watch me before you would smile your wicked smile.  I was never left to my own decisions and followed your orders to the last degree.  This is what gave you that wicked smile.  What would your smile look like if you were to watch me making my own decisions? Would you watch me if I decided to trace my body with my fingertips?  Watching the…

  • two dogs cuddled together both blonde in color
    kinks,  Sir/Daddy,  Toy for Sir

    Out of Character

    I don’t know what my character is anymore.  Along with that, I don’t have confidence in my ability to judge other people’s characters either.  Perhaps this is coming off of a good seven years of being wrong in my judgment and multiple people being out of character and my being too blind to see their truth.  I use to lean on the fact that I didn’t judge anyone and just let them show me who they were.  Lately (or just lately I have realized) that many people show me sooner than I recognize. Perhaps giving too many chances is the only thing I am guilty of.  I actually hope that…

  • old fashion dagger stained with blood on red silky sheet
    Experiences,  kinks,  Learning the Hard Way,  Masturbation Monday,  Relationship Thoughts Old and New,  Sir/Daddy,  Thoughts,  Toy for Sir,  Trust


    I swore I wasn’t going to write about you anymore.  I closed the door and locked it securely – or so I thought.  But today, today hit me in the heart like a dagger.  A feeling I thought I would never experience again.  Sadly, I was wrong once again.   Apparently, I will never be able to forget the experience of this dagger.  The unseen sharpness that slices through my skin with invisibility, piercing my heart with expert precise movement, never failing to hit its mark. This dagger is elusive, sneaky, stealthy.  The moment I think I have buried it, lost it, destroyed it, it returns to me out of nowhere.…

  • kinks,  Lifestyle


    All my life my favorite color was red!  Perhaps that was a sign.  Funny thing is, back in the day, girls were supposed to like pink and pastel colors and red was for whores.  It wasn’t a power color back then.  I don’t even remember when it changed or when I noticed it changed, but I always loved the color. I started wearing red when I was pregnant with my daughter.  I hated all the maternity clothes.  The word Baby with an arrow pointing to my stomach was not cute to me.  So I bought larger clothes and started adding red scarves and such. Embracing the “red” in my life…

  • finger trace male hands female backside black and white
    BDSM,  kinks

    Tracing a Finger

    For all the thrills we get from our kinks, impact play, bondage, suspension, there is also the lighter side we don’t often hear as much about.  Or perhaps it is that I don’t talk about it as much, read about it as much or focus on it as much as I do the other kinks I enjoy.  The tracing of a finger, the long stare, eyes connected and no need to look away.  These are things that have been brought to my attention lately. It has been a year since my D/s relationship ended.  Much of my focus has been on the loss kinks that I enjoyed during the time…